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October 18, 2019

Interview Fvneral Fvkk


Hi, Fvneral Fvkk. Greetings from Sick and Destroy team. What are you up to these days?

Blessings upon thee, my little sheep. We are doing what we always do: walking around preaching the name of our holy sacred father and looking for little boys to not only join our ranks in the Chvrch of holy fvkk, but also to join our bedrooms. As Jesus was nailed, so shall they!

Would you please introduce your band to our readers who are not aware of your band and music?

Let’s make this short: we are FVNERAL FVKK and we play epic, melancholic Doom Metal. Our lyrical themes are based entirely on the church and their crimes and debauchery, all the rape, extortion and murder they commited over the years, but also about the absurdity of some o fit all. To underline this, we clearly wear this priest-image in a very cynical way.

Give us a little insight into the formation of the band. When and how did it happen?

When christianity was born, it was the first professional pedophile-ring and exploitation company on earth. The roots for this band were settled already then. Over the course of 2000 years, the church was nothing more than an elitist of holy rapists, murderers and thieves. But all the time, they tried to stay hidden, in the mists of religion, in the shadows, concealed behind the masks, the robes, the cum-stained mandylion. Recently, us poor priests decided not to hide anymore. We were sick of living in secret. God demands rape, this is what the church always did. We now wanted the world to see what „God’s love“ really means. Thus, we formed the Chvrch of holy fvkk and now spread our gospel. The band is just a medium for our church, a means to recruit more acolytes and believers. And we are pretty successful, we get more followers everyday.

At what age did you guys start playing instruments? Since when are you into metal music?

I started playing at six. I played the priest-flute. Boy, I had to blow it every day, and it tasted terrible, but it was worth it. I forged my talents from there.

Fvneral Fvkk recently released “Carnal Confessions”. Tell us something about it. Walk us through all the tracks lyrics and meaning.

ALL the tracks? Jesus, what might happen if you copy/paste this question to a Grindcore band….
Well, alright.

„Chapel of Abuse“ is about… well, this title is totally self-explaining. It is exactly about what you think.

„A Shadow In the Dormitory“ is about the Gibault School for boys. A wonderful place in Indiana, USA.
Unfortunately it has been closed. It was a great place to live. Ask Charles Manson and Will Heirens. They both were there. They loved it so much that they carried the philosophy of this place into the world…

„Alone with the Cross“ was written by Cantor Cinaedicus about the love towards God. Real love. Sexual love!
You know, when you desperately want God inside you. In your soul, and in your anus. So you take the crucifix and shove it right in. This ist he only song on the album not based on a true event, even though there have been incidents like this in real life.

„The Hallowed Leech“ is about Pope Innozenz III. A great pope. Unlike the weaklings that call themselves „pope“ these days, he was not afraid to bleed children to death just to prolong his reign! He was the first person ever to recieve a blood transfusion, and he did not ask the donors for permission! What a man, what an inspiration to us all!

„Poor Sisters of Nazareth“ is about, well, the Poor Sisters of Nazareth, who are a union of Irish catholic nuns. Even though as christians we are naturally afraid of women and thus must supress them whenever we can, we still appreciate them  a lot. They sure know how to treat children and make them better and stronger persons. Beating, torturing, abusing. Don’t you hate all these modern child-raising methods, too? Then the Poor Sisters are your choice, man!

„To Those in the Grave“ is about an austrialian cardinal, who bravely helped the church by stopping pesky police investigation after mass-suicides of weak young people, who just killed themselves just because of a little beating and anal sex. Jesus, such sissy cry-babies. The poor priests almost had to stop their anal fun when police came to ask questions. Thank God that cardinal stopped them, so the fvkking can go on. What a hero!

„When God is Not Watching“ is about love. Real love! The purest form of love: the love between men!

How has been the response so far by the listeners? Have you started working on new songs already?

The response has been overwhelming. The limited edition was already sold-out by pre-order. And only one day after release, people were already singing along when we played the new tracks live. You see: our message is the truth. People relate to it. This is the beginning of a new age of religious sexual freedom!
And no, we did not write new songs yet. Why should we? All we priests care for is money. As long as our devotees pay, there is no need to write new stuff.

When and where did you play your first gig? How was the experience of going live for the first time?

My first gig with this band was only last year. It was nice and pretty much fun. My first gig at all was 20 years ago, and I was so nervous that I did not enjoy it at all.

What, according to you, is the secret behind the band’s success?

We are the answer to so many people’s wishes. They always wanted to feel close to God, but they always wanted to free their perversions, too. It was just impossible. Until now. In the church of holy fvkk they finally can be the pervert bastard believers they always wanted to be. That’s why we sell shitloads of records and get more famous every day!

… and to give you a more serious answer: I do not really know, but I guess we just write good songs. At least, I think we do!

Ever had an epic fail moment during a gig?

Yes, but only with other bands we played in. Fvneral Fvkk is protected by the holy horny spirit, and thus never fails!

If asked to differentiate Fvneral Fvkk from other bands in your country, how would you like to respond to it?

Just look at our pictures and read our lyrics, and it becomes totally obvious.

Which bands/ artists do you draw your influences from? Which are your favorite local bands?

Our main influences are Johann Sebastian Bach because of his religious masochism and Michael Jackson because of his interest in very young fans.
I must admit that my favourite local bands are very profane ones: Dawn of Obliteration, Urza, Repulsive Feast, Collapse Instinct, Die Versauten Dachdecker and Die Kassierer.

How do you guys manage jobs and gigs? Also how often do you guys gathering altogether just to fun?

It’s very hard to get it all managed. But it is our duty for the lord. We must not complain. We never get together just for fun. Fun is a sin!

Fvneral Fvkk is very promising formation. Talking of your future, 5 years from now, where do you see yourself?

I do not know. Where do you see your magazine five years from now? [Must ask from the site owner, haha, because I’m just a freelance writer so probably I’ll leave it or I will continue]

Well, that’s it. Thanks a lot for your time. Speak out to all your fans and supporters.

The dirtier your bible, the cleaner your soul.